Sunday, May 15, 2005


The illness of a parent is probably one of the most heartbreaking experiences one can have. Someone you have seen in the prime of their life, you now watch going rapidly downhill, and there isnt much you can do. The person you looked up to for every need, the one whom you depended on for so many things, is now old and feeble and needs you.

My mom and her siblings have been dealing with this role-reversal for the past two years now. Their father i.e. my grandfather has a nervous problem that is getting progressively worse. It causes memory lapses like Alzheimer's. It gives him hallucinations, and all kinds of imaginary illnesses. There are days when he will be perfectly normal, and days when he'll regress into childhood. The whole thing is hard to describe, and even harder to watch. At times he gets so hard to handle, the doctor ends up admitting him into hospital. And after a few days, Nanaji is back to his old placid self and you are left wondering if the whole thing was a bad dream.

My mom suffers when she sees him like this. And I feel really bad for her. It often makes me wonder if someday I'll be in a similar position. And that scares the hell out of me. I cant handle the thought of my mom or dad being old and sick. Silly of me, I know, but there it is all the same. It's something that has been bothering me a lot these days.